• Woman Enough Profiles

Woman Enough: Tiffany Femling

My book is available as an ebook (Woman Enough– paperbacks coming soon!) and I decided to continue to interview some women who I believe are some of the bravest, and who deserve to have their stories shared. I want to celebrate women. Nothing more, nothing less. Here they are in their own words. I am humbled and grateful to have a small snapshot into their worlds.

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Tiffany and I as new Mamas a few years ago

I met Tiffany in ninth grade. She was new in town. We were in choir together from that year on, and I remember thinking what warm smile and kind eyes she had. We lost touch after high school, until she reached out to me during her time in California (see her responses below), while I was living in Vermont. She was in deep- in the depths of her struggles- and while I couldn’t physically be there for her, I held her close. Four years ago, I was finally able to give her the hug I’d been waiting so long to give her and we got to meet each other’s children. Tiffany is a Wonder Woman. She has faced her battles head on, with love still remaining in her heart for not only her children, but for life. Tiffany is one of the strongest women I know. She is light, she is love, still has a warm smile and kind eyes, and she is definitely WOMAN ENOUGH. 

Name: Tiffany Femling

Please share whatever you would like us to know about yourself:

I am a multiple time attempted suicide survivor. I have many mental health diagnosises, including Schizoaffective disorder, Panic disorder and PTSD. My life changed drastically when I had my first child almost eight years ago. I am the mother of a seven-year-old girl and a four-year-old boy. Their names are Raegan and Xander. They are my life! I have a hippie soul, but I live a more conventional life now. Being honest and real with myself and others has helped me harvest many great relationships. 

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Looking back on your life thus far, what has been your biggest accomplishment?

My biggest accomplishment, besides being a single mom, has been my job as a news producer during college. I was amazed every time I produced a decent news show. I liked that I was on top of what was going on around the country. I was very focused on success at that time in my life, and I received a couple large writing scholarships for the work I had done. I was asked to take a full-time job at the station I was at, but I had already moved. I also had offers around the country, including Rhode Island. 

What makes you happy?

Being accepted for who I am makes me happy. Being understood. Writing makes me happy! I’m just starting to branch out to find writing opportunities. Singing makes me happy. I think my voice is kinda annoying, so if I could sing-talk, I’d be happy! I had to fight to keep my two kids in my custody because of my mental illnesses. My kids make me SO happy! The professionals that get paid to work with my kids and I make me happy. They are like friends! Dreaming and sleeping and loving .. make me happy! 

What’s something/a time you look back on & wish you would’ve done it differently, if any?

Hmm .. I moved out to Los Angeles in my early 20s to attend fashion school. I couldn’t stay focused on that, so I started acting as an extra in television shows, movies and commercials. I worked with various actors, including Angelina Jolie, Zach Braff, Clint Eastwood and Jim Carrey .. just to name a few. I was successful in my eyes, but I couldn’t sleep and my mental illnesses crept in. I wish I could erase that part of my life because I feel when I talk about that stage in my life that I was a joke. All that matters is that I remember the good from my time out there!

Has there been any significant moment in your life that has altered your path/your being/your calling? 

Out in Los Angeles I experimented with drugs and alcohol. I wanted to feel something because I don’t too often. Huge mistake! I probably could have stayed out in LA, if I hadn’t have experimented? 

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What makes you sad, & how do you deal with that sorrow?

I’m pretty unemotional. I’m currently going through PTSD treatment to deal with emotions that all got scrambled together. Talking about my past makes me sad, cuz I’ve experienced some great trauma. 

What is one of your mom’s traits that you admire(d)?

My mom knows how to get a lot done in a short period of time. She is a perfectionist. I am pretty much the opposite, but she attempts to teach me as much as she can, while she’s still around .. especially cooking and cleaning. I have gradually learned her ways, but I have work to do. I love her! 

When you think of your grandmother(s), what comes to mind?

My mom’s mom was a piano teacher and spent a lot of time playing music. I don’t recall her speaking too often. I’ve been told that we have a lot of the same traits. She passed away when I was five, and I’ll always remember tears falling from my grandpa’s eyes at her funeral. My dad’s mom passed away when I was in my early teens. She was very special to me. Her voice was so soft, and her house had a certain smell. She wasn’t the greatest cook, but she tried. I loved visiting her place! 

What time in your life do you feel was the most challenging?

Growing up filled with anxiety was the toughest part of my life. I always felt different than my peers, and I tried extra hard to fit in. I know now that I have different friends from all over. I only consider my real friends the ones I can be myself around. 

Last but not least, how do you see yourself, & how do you want others to see you?

I want other people to see me as me. Open, honest and real. Some people have a difficult time accepting who I am. I am a lover, and I really don’t dislike many. I have a hippie soul who has work to do in this lifetime. 

Tiffany is an excellent writer whose voice needs to be heard. Tiffany’s writing can be found on her sister’s blog here  Amy’s blog

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